And before any of us knew it, we're already through one third of our season. Seems like we were crushing brews and downing chicken tenders at Tavern on Third just last week in anticipation of the 2014 Equalizer season. The off-the-field issues of the NFL have begun to subside, but I think we are in the midst of one of the largest cover-ups in the league's history and unfortunately do not think we will ever get the truth. But back to the product on the field, bye weeks began in week 4 and now we will see the management acumen across the Equalizer league. Let's get into it.
Aaron Rodgers - R-E-L-A-X, the message delivered to Packers fans after the green and gold have struggled to begin this year. And boy did he deliver. Came out and pitched virtually a perfect game, hooking up with Cobb and Jordy for two TD's a piece. What is more concerning in Packertown is the performance of Eddie Lacy. Minus a TD plunge, Lacy puts up a fourth consecutive fantasy goose egg against a struggling Chicago run defense. Are we witnessing this season's Trent Richardson (also a former Tide RB)?
Martellus Bennett - Having a monsterrrrrr 2014 thus far. Benefitting from Brandon Marshall being hampered by an ankle problem, Bennett pulled in 9 receptions for 134 yards on Sunday, while being targeted 11 times. Proving week in and week out to be a reliable option for Jay Cutler and an offense that wants to throw the football, Bennett currently ranks second among tight ends and seems poised for a breakout year.
New York Giants - Week 2 post, Giants offense one or two weeks from clicking. Fast forward to week 4, on the road on a Thursday night, Giants put up 45 points on the road in beating NFC East rival Washington Redskins in convincing fashion. Add a defense that is playing very good football, I think the Giants are certainly in the hunt come January.
Larry Donnell - Guy was targeted left and right in the red zone. Presents matchups problems for linebackers across the league, I expect Donnell to finish the year as a top 5 tight end.
Washington Redskins WR's - Did they not get the memo they were playing on Thursday night this week? 4 receptions, same amount of interceptions thrown by Kirk Cousins in week 4. Not what you want to see out of a pretty good crew of wide-outs.
Carolina Panthers - What is going on in Carolina right now? Defense has now been thrashed two consecutive weeks after finishing second in overall defense a year ago. Signing RB's off the street now because (surprise, surprise) Williams and Stewart can't stay healthy. And Cam Newton does not look like Cam Newton. It seems like that lingering rib injury is still impacting his game. The only saving grace for the Panthers is the performance of rookie wide-out Kelvin Benjamin, who ranks ninth among wideouts.
JJ Watt - Can we add IDP's to the league next season? Cause I am taking JJ Watt number one overall.
EJ Manuel - Bad enough to get benched for Kyle Orton, ouch...
Andrew Luck - Money in the bank right now. Another unbelievable performance this Sunday versus division rival Tennessee Titans. Colts have three capable defenses in the next three weeks, we'll see if Luck can keep it rolling.
Geno Smith - Self-explanatory.
Detroit Lions - Showed this weekend that this team does not go as Calvin Johnson goes. Golden Tate had himself a day, hauling in 8 catches for 116 yards on 10 targets. Minus the celebration ACL tear, defense appears to be much more disciplined this year. The Lions are back on the right track under first year coach Jim Caldwell.
Lamar Miller - Finally showing glimpses of what we expected from him coming into the league. Benefitting from a Knowshon Moreno elbow injury, Miller has posted fantasy scores of 16 and 18 points in the last two weeks respectively. If Miami can get more consistent play out of Tannehill, this should be a pretty good offense.
Antonio Brown - Perpetually open, can anyone guard this guy? Should've had a third TD catch on Sunday, set an NFL record 20 straight games with 5+ receptions.
Phillip Rivers - Playing possibly the best ball of his career right now. Put up another impeccable performance Sunday, picking apart the Jags for 377 yards and 3 touchdowns. In the running with Andrew Luck for MVP through 4 weeks so far this season.
Blake Bortles - Jags got drilled again Sunday, but Bortles was actually pretty good minus the two interceptions. Completed 78% of his passes on his way to 253 yards and 1 touchdown, could've definitely been worse considered the level of talent around him in Jacksonville.
Teddy Bridgewater - Another rookie QB making his starting debut, Bridgewater put on a clinic. Very effective moving the football against a capable secondary. Bridgewater's day would have been even better had he connected on a passing touchdown, which he did not do despite throwing for 300+ yards. Outdueled Matt Ryan just a week after the Falcons slaughtered the Tampa Bay Bucs, the future looks bright for Bridgewater in Minnesota with the weapons around him and Norv Turner calling the shots. Did suffer an ankle injury late in the game though, something to monitor.
Jerrick McKinnon - Raw talent the Vikings love up there in Minnesota. Exhibited why they love his upside on Sunday. Selected as the 96th overall pick by Minnesota, we got a glimpse at the Minnesota RB of the future, perhaps sooner than we thought with Adrian Peterson's current situation. Very savvy pickup by the Panties of Ethan's Mother to snag McKinnon with Asiata after Peterson was placed on the exempt list.
Steven Jackson - I think this illustrious career is nearing its end. Suffered some injuries last year so that we never really saw him at 100%, nothing to indicate this year that he isn't healthy. Just does not look explosive, not putting up fantasy viable performances, and there are some young, talented backs in Atlanta.
LeSean McCoy - LJ are you panicking yet? Back to back duds from last year's rushing champion, the Eagles are having issues running the football this year, averaging 87 yards rushing per game through four weeks. Add the emergence of Darren Sproles, and McCoy's fantasy value has taken a significant dip.
Frank Gore - Frank Gore showing us a little Benjamin Button action yesterday against the Eagles. 174 yards from scrimmage, Gore did a nice job answering some questions about Carlos Hyde possibly emerging as the better back in San Fran.
Dallas Cowboys - Don't look now but the boys are 3-1. Boasting a new look offense that is featuring the run game (finally), the Cowboys have done well to answer many of the questions they had to begin this year, specifically on the defensive side of the football. Did suffer some injuries Sunday night, but this group has been playing effective, hustle defense. No big names, you have a group of 11 guys hustling to the football and playing pretty well. Add one of the most complete offenses in the league, could the boys possibly break the 8-8 streak of three years?
New Orleans Saints - Sitting at 1-3 after the beatdown in Arlington, TX last night, some people had the Saints pegged as a Super Bowl Contender in 2014. Saving grace for the Saints is the rest of the NFC South continues to struggle.
Tom Brady - Patriots are just bad. I think Brady has been slightly off to me, but I think the bigger problem in New England is the lack of an offensive line and a deep threat on the outside. Brady looks nervous and jittery in the pocket and rightfully so. This had lead to rushed throws and turnovers. Contributing to the Pats inability to keep Brady upright is the lack of a playmaking wide receiver. Things are not going well if you are trying to force the ball in to Brandon LaFell. Julian Edelman is a good wide-out but not a number one option that spreads the field. Edelman is more effective when wide receivers over the top can pull coverage and he can operate underneath. Gronk still isn't one hundred percent and can be doubled anyways. And that defense looked quite porous last night. Not looking good in New England.
Kansas City Run Game - Charles looked incredible last night with the football and Knile Davis is legit. Added a weapon in Travis Kelce, the Kansas City offense looks really good. We already know Alex Smith is pretty safe with the football, add a very effective run game and this team will continue to score points.
That about wraps up week 4 for me. Look out for the week 4 power rankings later this week.
Tuesday, September 30, 2014
Tuesday, September 23, 2014
Week 3 Observations, Rants, etc.
Seems like we have escaped week 3 of NFL action with the focus on the play on the field and not the embarrassment taking place off of it. This week in NFL action was highlighted by some rather large upsets, about the best Super Bowl rematch we could have hoped for, and quite the scuffle taking place in Philly (may have been a better one in the stands if you haven't seen the videos...between eagles fans haha). So let's get down to it.
New York Giants - see last week's post. One more week and I think we see this offense start rolling. High on the G-men this week heading into Washington.
Rashad Jennings - It seems like the preseason concerns of Andre Williams eating into Jennings touches this season were unfounded. Currently a top 15 running back, Jennings figures to be one of the most consistent RB's in the league this season on a team that loves to pound the rock inside the ten.
Victor Cruz - Did we witness a coming out party this past Sunday? Will we see the salsa double digit times this season? I should certainly hope so, but let's be realistic. Still a work in progress in New York, Cruz was drafted on the hope he would be a high volume guy but has shown questionable hands and a questionable attitude so far this season.
DeAndre Hopkins - Might slowly be seeing a changing of the guard in Houston. I know Andre Johnson commands attention when on the field, but this kid has talent. May have a top 5 catch of the season when all is said and done, and it didn't even count.
Julio Jones - No Roddy White and Jones is still open all over the field. Guy just looks so smooth playing football, and has unbelievable hand-eye coordination. Over the shoulder catch turning his head completely around with a helmet on his head...unreal. Falcons defense looked really good Thursday against a bad Bucs team but I do not expect that to hold, leaving Ryan to sling it Jones all season. Ryan's production has taken a significant hit when playing away from home (5 of 7 away in the next 7 games), but Julio Jones is looking unguardable so far this season.
Mike Glennon - Stats from last season, 2600 yard, 19 touchdowns, 9 interceptions. In his rookie season, Glennon quietly put up solid numbers. With some shotty quarterback play thus far and McCown looking to be out for the near future, Glennon might be worth a stash. He is the QB of the future in Tampa.
Andy Dalton - Hue Jackson going out and showing he gives zero effs this season. Might have given Marvin Lewis one or two heart attacks while that ball was in the air, but this offense is looking to get creative. With the playmakers they have there, I expect Dalton to be the main beneficiary. And that defense is the real deal, the Bengals will certainly be around come January.
Jake Locker - Someone I expected some big things from to start this season, has struggled mightily the past two weeks, posting single digit fantasy points in each week while the Titans posted a miserable 17 points. Also some rumblings in Tennessee that Ken Whisenhunt is not opposed to a potential change if this continues.
Ravens backfield - flip a coin as to who will get the carries in Baltimore (actually three viable options, so maybe a coin doesn't work). Rookie Lorenzo Taliaferro looked good this past week, averaging over 5 YPC. We have seen Justin Forsett have success this season, and we know what Bernard Pierce can bring. Shaping up to be a RB by committee, stay away from this team. With Pitta going down for the year with a hip, only viable fantasy option on this team right now is Old Man Smith the III.
Browns backfield - On the other side of the field Sunday, Browns RB situation shaping up quite the same. Crowell and West look legitimate, both posting good fantasy numbers so far. Have barely seen the perennially fragile Ben Tate this season, who is poised to see the carries on a team that will likely lean on the run with conservative QB play.
Aaron Rodgers - Like Brees and Brady, Rodgers is off to a slow start this season. He almost looks timid out there (can hardly blame him behind that o-line). Does not take off and run like he used which made him that much more dangerous, I am wondering if maybe the collarbone injury is having lingering effects on his psyche.
Andrew Luck - Best looking QB in the game right now. Almost pitched a perfect game this Sunday, Luck leads the league with 74 fantasy points. Potentially loses a weapon in TY Hilton, lack of a run game and a mediocre defense mean Luck will have to win games with his arm and his legs, a very effective runner.
New England Patriots - Offense looks really, really bad. Brady is not the Brady of old. Gronk still appears to be slightly limited. Vereen not being featured much, and they're simply just not scoring enough to be a viable fantasy option. Julian Edelman commands value in a PPR league, but not much here other than that. Through three weeks thus far, the Pats have taken a tumble.
Teddy Bridgewater - TEDDY TEDDY!! And now begins the Bridgewater era in Minnesota. I would have been a lot more comfortable with Adrian Peterson being a safety valve here, but I am expecting big things from Bridgewater. Jerrick McKinnon is a physical freak and could become the back of the Vikings future, and Bridgewater will be banking on that to right the ship in Minnesota in a tough NFC North division.
Brandin Cooks - Cooks continues to emerge as a favorite target for a struggling Drew Brees. Marques Colston is on his way to an irrelevant season, and from there the Saints depth chart is a crap shoot. In a PPR format, Cooks looks to be a viable flew option.
Kirk Cousins - Finally, we get to see Cousins in action in this new Jay Gruden offense. And boy did he show why some in DC feel pretty strongly he gives the Skins the best chance to win week in and week out. Slung it around for 427 yards and 3 touchdowns this week, we may have seen the last of RGIII in a Redskin uniform (barring any unforeseen action by Dan Snyder, whose management practices are all but sensible).
Nick Foles - Really made me eat my words from earlier this season saying I expected him to come crashing back down to Earth. Took an absolute pounding on Sunday, kept getting up and dropping dimes for touchdowns. Fell victim to a cheap hit in a heated rivalry, Foles comes back and tells Chris Baker to hold his nuts. Made even more impressive considering the Eagles got minimal production out of McCoy and Sproles.
Tony Romo - Don't count the Boys out just yet. Boasting some of the best weapons in the league, this new Scott Linehan offense seems to be centered on ball control and keeping that putrid defense off the field. However, after falling down 21 points this past Sunday, Romo showed he can still toss it when he needs to. A very efficient 217 yards for two touchdowns, the Cowboys also got some surprising play out of their defense down the stretch. In other news, who is Austin Davis? Jeff Fisher says Shaun Hill is still his starter, but Davis hasn't been a slouch, moving the ball pretty effectively with mediocre weapons at his disposal.
Arizona Cardinals - Perhaps the biggest surprise of the season so far, the Cards are 3-0 and first in the NFC West after beating the 49ers at home this weekend. This team isn't surprising for a lack of talent, but for some key injuries thus far this season. Carson Palmer, Darnell Dockett, Andre Ellington is not 100% but this team is winning football games. Drew Stanton has filled in admirably and it appears Floyd is the man in the desert now. Also, John Brown was an intriguing player to watch in the preseason. While I don't expect the touchdown production to continue, this kid has the physical tools to break one every time he touches it.
San Francisco 49ers - There have been rumors that Jim Harbaugh has been losing this locker room, and they appear to have merit based on this past Sunday. There is no discipline on this team, with dumb penalties costing this team two potential wins in back to back weeks. Kap possibly used a racial slur on the field, Boldin headbutts a player, and they lose a veteran presence in Vernon Davis on the field for another week potentially. Time to right the ship in No Cal or this team could find itself competing with St. Louis for the cellar dwellers of the NFC West.
Emmanuel Sanders - I was a Sanders believer going into the year, and he has not disappointed through three weeks. Playing the Eric Decker role with more speed, has looked very good this far. Even with the return of Wes Welker, was targeted 15 times on Sunday. That sort of utilization can only lead to good things. You may be able to argue it was a result of game flow, but with Demaryius Thomas not looking very good so far this year (Dan that's for you), Sanders is primed to have a top 20 WR year with possibly even more upside if he can start finding the end zone.
Pittsburgh Steelers - What happened Sunday night? I went to bed after the first half and wake up to see the Steelers trounced the Panthers in Carolina. Have we all underestimated this team? Against one of the best rush defenses in the league, the Steelers post not one, but two one hundred yard rushers. We know what Big Ben and Antonio Brown bring to the field, and with Markus Wheaton showing playmaking ability, this offense could be formidable. Perhaps the Ravens game was the outlier so far this year. Paid for the win with some key losses on the defensive side of the football, the Steelers will be looking for a lot out of Big Ben and that offense.
Matt Forte - Starting to raise a few eyebrows. Has not reached the end zone yet this season, and has failed to score double digit fantasy points in consecutive weeks in standard scoring. While he has played two of the top defenses in the NFL, his ADP and the weapons around him suggest he should show more resiliency to matchups. Obviously one of the top players in the NFL, just something to monitor at a position we have seen steep, swift declines in the past.
Alright boys, that about wraps up week 3 for me. Leave some in the comment section and let me know what else you guys are seeing out there.
New York Giants - see last week's post. One more week and I think we see this offense start rolling. High on the G-men this week heading into Washington.
Rashad Jennings - It seems like the preseason concerns of Andre Williams eating into Jennings touches this season were unfounded. Currently a top 15 running back, Jennings figures to be one of the most consistent RB's in the league this season on a team that loves to pound the rock inside the ten.
Victor Cruz - Did we witness a coming out party this past Sunday? Will we see the salsa double digit times this season? I should certainly hope so, but let's be realistic. Still a work in progress in New York, Cruz was drafted on the hope he would be a high volume guy but has shown questionable hands and a questionable attitude so far this season.
DeAndre Hopkins - Might slowly be seeing a changing of the guard in Houston. I know Andre Johnson commands attention when on the field, but this kid has talent. May have a top 5 catch of the season when all is said and done, and it didn't even count.
Julio Jones - No Roddy White and Jones is still open all over the field. Guy just looks so smooth playing football, and has unbelievable hand-eye coordination. Over the shoulder catch turning his head completely around with a helmet on his head...unreal. Falcons defense looked really good Thursday against a bad Bucs team but I do not expect that to hold, leaving Ryan to sling it Jones all season. Ryan's production has taken a significant hit when playing away from home (5 of 7 away in the next 7 games), but Julio Jones is looking unguardable so far this season.
Mike Glennon - Stats from last season, 2600 yard, 19 touchdowns, 9 interceptions. In his rookie season, Glennon quietly put up solid numbers. With some shotty quarterback play thus far and McCown looking to be out for the near future, Glennon might be worth a stash. He is the QB of the future in Tampa.
Andy Dalton - Hue Jackson going out and showing he gives zero effs this season. Might have given Marvin Lewis one or two heart attacks while that ball was in the air, but this offense is looking to get creative. With the playmakers they have there, I expect Dalton to be the main beneficiary. And that defense is the real deal, the Bengals will certainly be around come January.
Jake Locker - Someone I expected some big things from to start this season, has struggled mightily the past two weeks, posting single digit fantasy points in each week while the Titans posted a miserable 17 points. Also some rumblings in Tennessee that Ken Whisenhunt is not opposed to a potential change if this continues.
Ravens backfield - flip a coin as to who will get the carries in Baltimore (actually three viable options, so maybe a coin doesn't work). Rookie Lorenzo Taliaferro looked good this past week, averaging over 5 YPC. We have seen Justin Forsett have success this season, and we know what Bernard Pierce can bring. Shaping up to be a RB by committee, stay away from this team. With Pitta going down for the year with a hip, only viable fantasy option on this team right now is Old Man Smith the III.
Browns backfield - On the other side of the field Sunday, Browns RB situation shaping up quite the same. Crowell and West look legitimate, both posting good fantasy numbers so far. Have barely seen the perennially fragile Ben Tate this season, who is poised to see the carries on a team that will likely lean on the run with conservative QB play.
Aaron Rodgers - Like Brees and Brady, Rodgers is off to a slow start this season. He almost looks timid out there (can hardly blame him behind that o-line). Does not take off and run like he used which made him that much more dangerous, I am wondering if maybe the collarbone injury is having lingering effects on his psyche.
Andrew Luck - Best looking QB in the game right now. Almost pitched a perfect game this Sunday, Luck leads the league with 74 fantasy points. Potentially loses a weapon in TY Hilton, lack of a run game and a mediocre defense mean Luck will have to win games with his arm and his legs, a very effective runner.
New England Patriots - Offense looks really, really bad. Brady is not the Brady of old. Gronk still appears to be slightly limited. Vereen not being featured much, and they're simply just not scoring enough to be a viable fantasy option. Julian Edelman commands value in a PPR league, but not much here other than that. Through three weeks thus far, the Pats have taken a tumble.
Teddy Bridgewater - TEDDY TEDDY!! And now begins the Bridgewater era in Minnesota. I would have been a lot more comfortable with Adrian Peterson being a safety valve here, but I am expecting big things from Bridgewater. Jerrick McKinnon is a physical freak and could become the back of the Vikings future, and Bridgewater will be banking on that to right the ship in Minnesota in a tough NFC North division.
Brandin Cooks - Cooks continues to emerge as a favorite target for a struggling Drew Brees. Marques Colston is on his way to an irrelevant season, and from there the Saints depth chart is a crap shoot. In a PPR format, Cooks looks to be a viable flew option.
Kirk Cousins - Finally, we get to see Cousins in action in this new Jay Gruden offense. And boy did he show why some in DC feel pretty strongly he gives the Skins the best chance to win week in and week out. Slung it around for 427 yards and 3 touchdowns this week, we may have seen the last of RGIII in a Redskin uniform (barring any unforeseen action by Dan Snyder, whose management practices are all but sensible).
Nick Foles - Really made me eat my words from earlier this season saying I expected him to come crashing back down to Earth. Took an absolute pounding on Sunday, kept getting up and dropping dimes for touchdowns. Fell victim to a cheap hit in a heated rivalry, Foles comes back and tells Chris Baker to hold his nuts. Made even more impressive considering the Eagles got minimal production out of McCoy and Sproles.
Tony Romo - Don't count the Boys out just yet. Boasting some of the best weapons in the league, this new Scott Linehan offense seems to be centered on ball control and keeping that putrid defense off the field. However, after falling down 21 points this past Sunday, Romo showed he can still toss it when he needs to. A very efficient 217 yards for two touchdowns, the Cowboys also got some surprising play out of their defense down the stretch. In other news, who is Austin Davis? Jeff Fisher says Shaun Hill is still his starter, but Davis hasn't been a slouch, moving the ball pretty effectively with mediocre weapons at his disposal.
Arizona Cardinals - Perhaps the biggest surprise of the season so far, the Cards are 3-0 and first in the NFC West after beating the 49ers at home this weekend. This team isn't surprising for a lack of talent, but for some key injuries thus far this season. Carson Palmer, Darnell Dockett, Andre Ellington is not 100% but this team is winning football games. Drew Stanton has filled in admirably and it appears Floyd is the man in the desert now. Also, John Brown was an intriguing player to watch in the preseason. While I don't expect the touchdown production to continue, this kid has the physical tools to break one every time he touches it.
San Francisco 49ers - There have been rumors that Jim Harbaugh has been losing this locker room, and they appear to have merit based on this past Sunday. There is no discipline on this team, with dumb penalties costing this team two potential wins in back to back weeks. Kap possibly used a racial slur on the field, Boldin headbutts a player, and they lose a veteran presence in Vernon Davis on the field for another week potentially. Time to right the ship in No Cal or this team could find itself competing with St. Louis for the cellar dwellers of the NFC West.
Emmanuel Sanders - I was a Sanders believer going into the year, and he has not disappointed through three weeks. Playing the Eric Decker role with more speed, has looked very good this far. Even with the return of Wes Welker, was targeted 15 times on Sunday. That sort of utilization can only lead to good things. You may be able to argue it was a result of game flow, but with Demaryius Thomas not looking very good so far this year (Dan that's for you), Sanders is primed to have a top 20 WR year with possibly even more upside if he can start finding the end zone.
Pittsburgh Steelers - What happened Sunday night? I went to bed after the first half and wake up to see the Steelers trounced the Panthers in Carolina. Have we all underestimated this team? Against one of the best rush defenses in the league, the Steelers post not one, but two one hundred yard rushers. We know what Big Ben and Antonio Brown bring to the field, and with Markus Wheaton showing playmaking ability, this offense could be formidable. Perhaps the Ravens game was the outlier so far this year. Paid for the win with some key losses on the defensive side of the football, the Steelers will be looking for a lot out of Big Ben and that offense.
Matt Forte - Starting to raise a few eyebrows. Has not reached the end zone yet this season, and has failed to score double digit fantasy points in consecutive weeks in standard scoring. While he has played two of the top defenses in the NFL, his ADP and the weapons around him suggest he should show more resiliency to matchups. Obviously one of the top players in the NFL, just something to monitor at a position we have seen steep, swift declines in the past.
Alright boys, that about wraps up week 3 for me. Leave some in the comment section and let me know what else you guys are seeing out there.
Thursday, September 18, 2014
Week 3 Predictions
2014 Record: 8-4 (LW: 5-1)
Dark Force (0-2) at Touch My TD’s (2-0)
The Muscle: Demaryious Thomas. It’s time for him to step up. I’m going out on a limb here and projecting a repeat-Super Bowl performance (not for the team, but for the individual).
SGF Dirtdogs (0-2) at The Old Guys Club (1-1)
The Fat Cats (2-0) at Redwood Chipalopes (1-1)
PB Pandemonium (1-1) at Ethan’s Mom’s Panties (0-2)
Ants in My Eyes Collins (2-0) at Las Vegas Outlaws (2-0)
SASKATCHEWAN Rough Riders (1-1) at Roc City Super Dudes (2-0)
The Looks: Rashad Jennings. Houston’s defense has been a stone wall thus far into 2014.
We’re two weeks into the fantasy football season, which —
like a virgin on prom night or Kaier in the heart of Lent — means its time to
prematurely exaggerate the merits of one team’s triumphs and another team’s
defeats. If the season ended today, The Fat Cats would be in the title match,
the Dirtdogs would be wearing the BAMA, and, wait a minute, is this 2013 all
over again?
Before we fall into that trap, I’d like to remind everyone
of his fantasy football mortality. Like Jamal Charles’ ankle or AJ Green’s big
toe, the difference between success and failure in The Equalizer is but a
fragile combination of chance, competence and circumstance. That’s what I’m
telling myself at least, as I sit 2 games and a bajillion points back of the
league’s best just two weeks removed from an offseason of optimism.
A brief look through the league history, however, reveals that many of our fates might already be sealed this early into the year:
A brief look through the league history, however, reveals that many of our fates might already be sealed this early into the year:
Let’s look back to The Equalizer’s inaugural season in 2009,
when a young Ben Cronin was staking his claim as the game’s most promising
up-and-coming ginger, he-who-shall-not-be-named was diligently putting the BA
in BAMA, and yours truly was being crowned champion. Just
one of the league’s ten founding franchises started 0-2 that year, and that same team failed
to make the playoffs at season's end. And so, just like the NFL’s notorious 0-2 death
sentence, an ominous trend was born in our great league.
Flash-forward to today and Andy Dalton has solidified
himself as the premier ginger in the game, the BAMA is tangible proof of just
how low a season can get, and yours truly is on the bottom of the standings. As
for those 0-2 teams, since Brendan’s infamous 0-13 campaign, 11 teams have
started their season’s 0-2 and just 2 have made the playoffs. Inversely, 11
teams have started 2-0 since 2009 and 7 have tasted postseason glory.
So I can preach all I want about poor matchups, shitty
luck, phantom timeout calls or whatnot,
but the numbers simply don’t lie: With a 64% shot at making the playoffs, Ryan,
Ethan, Evan and Rich will soon be thinking seeding rather than simply playoffs,
and with a 83% chance of being in losers’ ladder, Mark, Brad, Andy and
myself…well…we’re fucked.
Congrats to Rich for raking in the Hamilton in Week 2. Now
for Week 3 predictions:
Dark Force (0-2) at Touch My TD’s (2-0)
The Looks: Bobby Rainey. Hard to figure this guy will get 19
paints when his team can’t even gain 19 yards on most of its drives thus far
this year. And that’s while playing at home…
The Brains: Andrew Luck. Luck is always a smart play, but
particularly against this Jags defense.
The Muscle: Demaryious Thomas. It’s time for him to step up. I’m going out on a limb here and projecting a repeat-Super Bowl performance (not for the team, but for the individual).
The Wildcard: Muhammad Sanu. Will AJ play?
The Result: I talked myself into picking Dark Force despite all
the signs pointing to Touch My TD’s. Simply don’t like Rainey and Ellington’s
matchups and expect big things from my revenge-seeking Broncos’ studs.
Dark Force 115,
Touch My TD”s 108
SGF Dirtdogs (0-2) at The Old Guys Club (1-1)
The Looks: Giovani Bernard. Jeremy Hill will continue to
impress and steal touches.
The Brains: Jay Cutler. See: Aaron Rodgers from Week 2
Predictions.
The Muscle: Drew Brees. Brees could put up 25 points in the
Superdome with his left arm tied behind his back.
The Wildcard: Brandin Cooks. We know Brees will be slinging
it all over the field on Sunday, but will Cooks be on the
receiving end enough times to meet his projection?
The Result: I love Brees in the home opener for an angry
Saints team, but I hate everything else about the Dirtdogs this week.
The Old Guys Club 119,
SGF Dirtdogs 83
The Fat Cats (2-0) at Redwood Chipalopes (1-1)
The Looks: Allen Hurns. Hurns came back to reality in Week 2.
The Colts are desperate for a win and should have no problem reminding Hurns of
his reality should he begin to stir on Sunday.
The Brains: Jordy Nelson. The only reason he isn’t the
muscle is Jimmy Graham.
The Muscle: Jimmy Graham. Have I mentioned I like the Saints
at home this week?
The Wildcard: Jonathan Stewart. Stewart is the only healthy
back in the Panthers’ backfield heading into Sunday. The Ravens ran all over
the Steelers in Week 2. Should bode well for Stewart, but then again, this is
Jonathan Stewart we are talking about.
The Result: Too many question marks on the Chipalopes with
Hurns, Stewart and a gimpy Marshall. I’ll take The Fat Cats' trio of studs.
The Fat Cats 139,
Redwood Chipalopes 116
PB Pandemonium (1-1) at Ethan’s Mom’s Panties (0-2)
The Looks: James Jones. I simply can’t trust a rookie QB
playing in Foxborough.
The Brains: Reggie Wayne. The Colts need to get back on
track. They need big contributions from Wayne to do so. The Jags should allow
him to provide just that.
The Muscle: Demarco Murray. Murray finally gets the credit
he deserves as the Week 3 muscle.
The Wildcard: Peyton Manning. This is likely the only time
Manning finds himself here. I obviously like the Broncos to have a bounce-back
performance against Seattle this time around, but the Legion of Boom will
certainly have something to say about that.
The Result: A bust performance by Manning could keep this
one close, but Pandemonium is too deep at the skill positions to drop this one.
PB Pandemonium 136,
Ethan’s Mom’s Panties 119
Ants in My Eyes Collins (2-0) at Las Vegas Outlaws (2-0)
The Looks: Le’Veon Bell. The Panthers may have lost some
offensive weapons in the offseason, but its defense hasn’t skipped a beat.
The Brains: Stevan Ridley. When the Patriots play a team
like the Raiders at home, they tend to assert their muscle on the ground. As
long as Ridley doesn’t fumble on his first carry, he should have a nice
afternoon.
The Muscle: Dez Bryant. The more dominant Demarco Murray
becomes, the more things should open up for Dez.
The Wildcard: AJ Green. Will AJ play?
The Result: Whether AJ Green plays or not, I like Collins’
matchups in this one. Simply don’t like multiple Steelers going against the
Panthers D on a Sunday night.
Ants in My Eyes
Collins 120, Las Vegas Outlaws 113
SASKATCHEWAN Rough Riders (1-1) at Roc City Super Dudes (2-0)
The Looks: Rashad Jennings. Houston’s defense has been a stone wall thus far into 2014.
The Brains: Alfred Morris. Morris rushed for a couple of
scores last week. With a young QB getting the start on the road in a Divisional
game, I expect Morris to be a bigger factor than expected in this one.
The Muscle: Matt Ryan. I love Matty Ice playing in the dome
against what I would deem to be the biggest disappointment of a team thus far
in 2014. I might as well add Julio Jones to the mix while I’m at it.
The Wildcard: Torrey Smith. Smith could disappoint again. Or
he could finally reel in that illusive deep ball that all Smith owners have
been waiting for.
The Result: Riley Cooper will likely lay a dud, but the
Superdudes have too much fire power in the rest of the receiving corps and at
QB to be denied in this one.
Roc City Superdudes
128, SASKATCHEWAN Rough Riders 120
Week 2 Power Rankings
After the first two weeks of the season, could not have asked for more drama in the NFL. Jonathan Dwyer the latest NFL RB to get caught throwing 'bows, and Adrian Peterson's high school football coach used to haze Peterson with a paddle? I can't make this stuff up. Anyways, here are the power rankings after two weeks of the season.
Week 2 Power Rankings:
1. The Fat Cats
2. Ants in my Eyes Collins
3. Las Vegas Outlaws
4. Touch my TD's
5. Roc City Super Dudes
6. PB Pandemonium
7. Redwood Chipalopes
8. The Old Guys Club
9. Saskatchewan Rough Riders
10. Dark Force
11. Ethan's Mom's Panties
12. SGF Dirtdogs
The Fat Cats - Talk about coming out of the gates swinging. Put a hurting on the perennial "BAMA" favorite SGF in week one, with an absolute STUD performance out of Calvin Johnson. And then what do the obese felines do for an encore in week 2 but put of the most points in the league by 13 points! Sproles is the biggest fantasy surprise to start this season, and if it weren't for a lackluster showing from the best defense in the league, the Fat Cats score 160 points in week 2. Owning the number one player at three different positions and the number 2 wide receiver, the Cats are poised for a long run at the top.
Ants in my Eyes Collins - The man with the ants in his eyes is planning to ride the three-headed PPR monster of a RB crew in Pierre Thomas, Danny Woodhead, and Shane Vereen to an Equalizer championship after dealing Arian Foster this week. With the injury to Ryan Matthews and Danny Woodhead's presumed increased workload, he just may do it. Boasting perhaps the best WR crew in the league with Bryant, Green, and Edelman, this team is built for the long haul. I have the Collins just a smidge below the Cats solely due to performance thus far in 2014.
Las Vegas Outlaws - Posts a more than impressive 149 points in week one riding the Black & Yellow tandem of Le'Veon Bell and Antonio Brown. Then in week 2, Stevan "I was 30 seconds from being cut" Ridley gets the nod in Minnesota to literally carry the NE Patriots to a victory on the road. If Ridley's usage continues to be consistent (which is a crapshoot knowing Belichick) and Vincent Jackson has a bounceback week like I expect him to, the Outlaws can expect some consistent production out of this crew.
Touch my TD's - 0-2 but this team is better than that record indicates. If Martin and Woodhead don't lay eggs in week one and Brandon Marshall doesn't go bananas in week two, this team might be 2-0. And the move to acquire Arian Foster only made this team better in my opinion. Andrew Luck obviously one of the best young talents in the league. Added some depth at the WR position in that same move for Foster, another team that I really like the upside on.
Roc City Super Dudes - Take a little bit of a dip from being my preseason number one, but you can't argue with 2-0. The injury to Ryan Mathews hits this team deep, leaving Lamar Miller as the third RB on this team. However, I suspect Julio Jones and Matthew Ryan are going to be playing a lot of catch up this season with that defense being swiss cheese, and expect some big passing numbers out of both. Looks for significant contributions out of rookie Sammy Watkins and the Bengals solid defense.
PB Pandemonium - A little slow out of the gates, with Victor Cruz and Michael Crabtree thinking the NFL had added a fifth preseason game in 2014. But bounces back to put up the second most points in week 2, nosing out a Jamal Charles-less 133 from the Old Guys Club. Chris Ivory is looking pretty good running the football, and is shaping up to be a decent RB2. WR core has received plenty of targets thus far, with Randall Cobb emerging as the GB Packers "go-to" on the goal line and Andrew Hawkins paying off thus far as a flyer. I again am on record saying Demarco Murray will easily be a top-5 RB this year, and NE's defense looks legitimate. As long as Peyton still looks like Peyton, should be able to scrounge points every week.
Redwood Chipalopes - Will he or won't he? Will we see Josh "Second hand smoke brah" Gordon play an NFL snap this season? If we do, this team boasts some of the most exciting wide-outs we have in the game in Gordon and Percy Harvin. Lesean McCoy, Brandon Marshall, and Matt Stafford are all guys that can explode in any given week. Eeked out a two point victory last week over the TD's, I believe this team has a ton of upside.
The Old Guy's Club - The Champ taking a little spill in 2014 after showing us young guns what fantasy football is all about in 2013. The injury to Charles is a devastating one, but it is looking like it is not as serious as a high ankle sprain (practiced today actually). And the handcuff pickup in Knile Davis, who is a very, very capable backup, was huge. Giovani Bernard catches a screen pass on every other play and Zack Ertz is the real deal. If Cutler stays healthy and productive, the reigning champ should be just fine this season.
Saskatchewan Rough Riders - Couple of bruisers in Lynch and Morris combined with the shifty C.J. Spiller make this one of the best RB crews in the league (as long as Spiller stays healthy). If the Rough Riders don't run into the buzz saw that is the Fat Cats in week 2, they beat most of the rest of the league and are 2-0 on the year. Need an upgrade at WR2 though, with Torrey Smith proving to be the inferior Smith in Baltimore so far this year.
Dark Force - O how the mighty have fallen...just kidding Dan but this is a bit of a dive for the Force. Two of the league's best at the RB position, but Forte and Lacy have under-performed thus far. Need an upgrade at QB and WR2, but what a stud at TE! Julius Thomas looks to be unguardable at the goal line, and is on pace for a Gronk/Graham-esque season.
Ethan's Mom's Panties - Adrian Peterson does his best to create two miniature Adrian Petersons and finds himself on the sideline for the foreseeable future because of it. And those are fairly large shoes to fill. Aaron Rodgers will do nicely filling some of that void, but I don't think Shonn Greene or Matt Asiata fill the rest. I like James Jones coming out of the gate, but without AP this pair of panties is looking more like skid marks than lingerie...
SGF Dirtdogs - Kaier better luck next week.
Alright that wraps up the week 2 power rankings. Maybe there's a little hometown bias in there (PB Pandemonium at 6!!!!) but I need to ride the high after that week 2 victory. Let me know your guys thoughts.
Week 2 Power Rankings:
1. The Fat Cats
2. Ants in my Eyes Collins
3. Las Vegas Outlaws
4. Touch my TD's
5. Roc City Super Dudes
6. PB Pandemonium
7. Redwood Chipalopes
8. The Old Guys Club
9. Saskatchewan Rough Riders
10. Dark Force
11. Ethan's Mom's Panties
12. SGF Dirtdogs
The Fat Cats - Talk about coming out of the gates swinging. Put a hurting on the perennial "BAMA" favorite SGF in week one, with an absolute STUD performance out of Calvin Johnson. And then what do the obese felines do for an encore in week 2 but put of the most points in the league by 13 points! Sproles is the biggest fantasy surprise to start this season, and if it weren't for a lackluster showing from the best defense in the league, the Fat Cats score 160 points in week 2. Owning the number one player at three different positions and the number 2 wide receiver, the Cats are poised for a long run at the top.
Ants in my Eyes Collins - The man with the ants in his eyes is planning to ride the three-headed PPR monster of a RB crew in Pierre Thomas, Danny Woodhead, and Shane Vereen to an Equalizer championship after dealing Arian Foster this week. With the injury to Ryan Matthews and Danny Woodhead's presumed increased workload, he just may do it. Boasting perhaps the best WR crew in the league with Bryant, Green, and Edelman, this team is built for the long haul. I have the Collins just a smidge below the Cats solely due to performance thus far in 2014.
Las Vegas Outlaws - Posts a more than impressive 149 points in week one riding the Black & Yellow tandem of Le'Veon Bell and Antonio Brown. Then in week 2, Stevan "I was 30 seconds from being cut" Ridley gets the nod in Minnesota to literally carry the NE Patriots to a victory on the road. If Ridley's usage continues to be consistent (which is a crapshoot knowing Belichick) and Vincent Jackson has a bounceback week like I expect him to, the Outlaws can expect some consistent production out of this crew.
Touch my TD's - 0-2 but this team is better than that record indicates. If Martin and Woodhead don't lay eggs in week one and Brandon Marshall doesn't go bananas in week two, this team might be 2-0. And the move to acquire Arian Foster only made this team better in my opinion. Andrew Luck obviously one of the best young talents in the league. Added some depth at the WR position in that same move for Foster, another team that I really like the upside on.
Roc City Super Dudes - Take a little bit of a dip from being my preseason number one, but you can't argue with 2-0. The injury to Ryan Mathews hits this team deep, leaving Lamar Miller as the third RB on this team. However, I suspect Julio Jones and Matthew Ryan are going to be playing a lot of catch up this season with that defense being swiss cheese, and expect some big passing numbers out of both. Looks for significant contributions out of rookie Sammy Watkins and the Bengals solid defense.
PB Pandemonium - A little slow out of the gates, with Victor Cruz and Michael Crabtree thinking the NFL had added a fifth preseason game in 2014. But bounces back to put up the second most points in week 2, nosing out a Jamal Charles-less 133 from the Old Guys Club. Chris Ivory is looking pretty good running the football, and is shaping up to be a decent RB2. WR core has received plenty of targets thus far, with Randall Cobb emerging as the GB Packers "go-to" on the goal line and Andrew Hawkins paying off thus far as a flyer. I again am on record saying Demarco Murray will easily be a top-5 RB this year, and NE's defense looks legitimate. As long as Peyton still looks like Peyton, should be able to scrounge points every week.
Redwood Chipalopes - Will he or won't he? Will we see Josh "Second hand smoke brah" Gordon play an NFL snap this season? If we do, this team boasts some of the most exciting wide-outs we have in the game in Gordon and Percy Harvin. Lesean McCoy, Brandon Marshall, and Matt Stafford are all guys that can explode in any given week. Eeked out a two point victory last week over the TD's, I believe this team has a ton of upside.
The Old Guy's Club - The Champ taking a little spill in 2014 after showing us young guns what fantasy football is all about in 2013. The injury to Charles is a devastating one, but it is looking like it is not as serious as a high ankle sprain (practiced today actually). And the handcuff pickup in Knile Davis, who is a very, very capable backup, was huge. Giovani Bernard catches a screen pass on every other play and Zack Ertz is the real deal. If Cutler stays healthy and productive, the reigning champ should be just fine this season.
Saskatchewan Rough Riders - Couple of bruisers in Lynch and Morris combined with the shifty C.J. Spiller make this one of the best RB crews in the league (as long as Spiller stays healthy). If the Rough Riders don't run into the buzz saw that is the Fat Cats in week 2, they beat most of the rest of the league and are 2-0 on the year. Need an upgrade at WR2 though, with Torrey Smith proving to be the inferior Smith in Baltimore so far this year.
Dark Force - O how the mighty have fallen...just kidding Dan but this is a bit of a dive for the Force. Two of the league's best at the RB position, but Forte and Lacy have under-performed thus far. Need an upgrade at QB and WR2, but what a stud at TE! Julius Thomas looks to be unguardable at the goal line, and is on pace for a Gronk/Graham-esque season.
Ethan's Mom's Panties - Adrian Peterson does his best to create two miniature Adrian Petersons and finds himself on the sideline for the foreseeable future because of it. And those are fairly large shoes to fill. Aaron Rodgers will do nicely filling some of that void, but I don't think Shonn Greene or Matt Asiata fill the rest. I like James Jones coming out of the gate, but without AP this pair of panties is looking more like skid marks than lingerie...
SGF Dirtdogs - Kaier better luck next week.
Alright that wraps up the week 2 power rankings. Maybe there's a little hometown bias in there (PB Pandemonium at 6!!!!) but I need to ride the high after that week 2 victory. Let me know your guys thoughts.
Tuesday, September 16, 2014
Week 2 Observations, Rants, etc.
I am not sure if I can remember a more eventful week in the NFL, and perhaps the most action was happening off the field. Ray Rice exhibited his left hook on security camera for the whole world to see. Roger Goodell proved to be either the worst liar and most incompetent commissioner we have in professional sports today (and that's saying something considering corruption is rampant through FIFA these days). And then if that wasn't enough, another face of the NFL faces child abuse charges in Texas after disciplining his son. And that's all before anybody laced it up and stepped on the gridiron for Week 2!! Dark dark week for the game we love boys, but I am confident there are better days ahead. For one, the Jets lost in the most Jets way possible this weekend (Go Pack Dan!), and we saw another bevy of upsets (Clevelandddd). Injuries, strange plays, and upset victories stole the headlines this weekend, let's get down to some of it.
Cleveland Browns - Don't look now but the Browns may no longer be the NFL's perennial pushover, and this with Hoyer at the helm. Miles Austin forgot how to suck for at least a week. Andrew Hawkins is proving worthy of the flyer I took on him. Despite no Ben Tate, Terrance West and Isaiah Crowell have filled in admirably. After a week one comeback came up just short, they beat the NO Saints on a last second FG in week 2. Might be a little bit of an overreaction here, but in a weak division look for the Browns to try and make a splash this season. From a fantasy perspective, we are still waiting on word for Josh Gordon's definitive status, and word from Cleveland is they really like Isaiah Crowell's game. Look for him to see an increased workload, and West becomes more of a 3rd down change of pace back.
AJ Green - A toe, really? Anyone remember a certain Rashad Johnson getting a finger torn off? Toughen up man.
New York Giants - I might catch some flack this one, but I think the G-Men are two weeks away from that offense clicking. Minus a punt return TD and a flukey fumble (wtf Jennings), they win the ball game against a good Arizona team this weekend. Victor Cruz will ideally lose the diva attitude and start catching balls, and Larry Donnell looks to be the real deal. The offense is designed to limit turnovers and move the ball methodically up the field. I think it can accomplish that and suits their personnel, just need to get everyone on the same page and Eli needs to lose the "spray and pray" mentality of last season.
Aaron Rodgers - Anyone think this guy isn't the best in the business right now? Jets applied constant pressure on Sunday, moving Aaron outside the pocket. Didn't slow him down, and if anything, he might be better outside of the hashmarks. Has not had a legitimate o-line in his entire career, but still gets it done week in and week out.
Jordy Nelson - Unbelievable hands. The long TD reception is the only that comes to mind where he wasn't making a tough catch.
Smiths on the Ravens - To begin this season, I had high hopes for Torrey Smith with Steve Smith Sr. coming to town. Finally someone to draw attention away from Torrey and open up more opportunities. Shaping up right now like that could't be farther from the truth. Through two games, Steve Smith Sr. has been targeted 25 times to Torrey's 10.
Sammy Watkins - Showing some toughness as a young gun in the league. Had himself a day this weekend even with the rib injury (AJ Green you reading this?). The Bills defense looks legit, EJ Manuel may be capable of managing ball games, and CJ Spiller showing some explosiveness this season. And don't hold your breath, but the Buffalo Bills lead the AFC East!!!
Tom Brady - I was very much on the Tom Brady bounceback season train to begin this season. In my mind, Brady and Manning were never going to slow down until they called it quits. With Gronk coming back this season, Brady just had to be better, right? So far, not so good. Forget any sort of situational football, Brady just does not look like the Brady of old. Too early to be pressing the panic button on one of the best to ever sling it, but I want to see some improvement next weekend against a weak Raiders team.
Matt Cassell - You don't play in Foxborough anymore, you're throwing to the guys in purple.
Knile Davis - Charles goes down, the Chiefs run game doesn't miss a beat. Along with Christine Michael, Latavius Murray, and Terrance West, Davis was a preseason favorite to step up to the plate if granted the opportunity. Still early to speculate on the Charles injury, but given any sort extended absence, Davis is a more than capable fill-in.
Kirk Cousins - In what I think may be a blessing in disguise, Kirk Cousins is the Redskins (am I allowed to use that name in print?) QB for the near future. With athletes a plenty around him, might be worth a pickup considering the poor play of some of the league's best so far.
Dallas Cowboys - Finally, someone is smart enough in Dallas to see the gem that is Demarco Murray and use him as such. Too many times last year Murray would dominate the first half to inexplicably see no action in the second half. They pounded the rock on Sunday and beat a very good Titans team in my opinion. If they can utilize Murray in controlling the clock and keeping that god awful defense off the field, might be able to steal a couple more W's. Also, I am on record in the preseason as saying Murray, if healthy for 16, will finish as a top 5 fantasy RB. You heard it here folks.
PS. That defense is bad. There is 12 of us in this league. Should we be trying out in Dallas? Kaier, can you get to work on some defensive schemes?
Antonio Gates - And here is this week's most over-added player. Had a career day Sunday against the league's best defense, but I think this is the best game Gates puts up this year. There is a lot of wear and tear on that body, and Ladarius Green is a stud in waiting.
Richard Sherman - If you have Twitter, please give this guy a follow. Great entertainment.
Josh McCown - Just not good so far. Plays with one of the best "throw it up and he'll get it" receivers in the game in Vincent Jackson and one of the best coming out of college in Mike Evans and he is just not getting it done. I had high hopes for McCown going into this year, considering he would be going from two big receivers in Chicago (Marshall, Jeffery) to two big receivers in Tampa. With Doug Martin proving to be dirt, not looking good right now for Lovie Smith and the Bucs.
Arian Foster - 55 attempts, 231 yards in two games thus far this season. That's quite the workload. Looking to prove the naysayers wrong when questioned about his durability. If we are seeing a reemergence of the Arian Foster of old, could prove to be quite the lineup with AJ Green and Dez Bryant on "Ants in my Eyes Collins."
Ahmad Bradshaw - Looks to be the guy in Indy. Went from a clear backup to seeing the most (as well as most significant) snaps of the two. Gotta give Richardson some credit for the way he ran last night, but two fumbles isn't going to win you a starters job. Also, Indy cannot run block. Bradshaw being the quicker man and better in the pass game figures to be the better choice in that situation. And with Indy's defense looking pretty suspect thus far, may find themselves down in games and going to the pass.
Nick Foles - Threw for 330 yards, but 150 of those were on dink and dunks to Darren Sproles. Has looked less than impressive so far to me, and looks almost gun shy coming out of the gate early in games. I expected him to come way back down to Earth this season in terms of production, we'll see how that pans out in the coming weeks, especially with a couple matchups against better defenses.
So that really wraps up week 2 for me, let me know what you think boys and be on the lookout for my bi-weekly power rankings later this week.
Cleveland Browns - Don't look now but the Browns may no longer be the NFL's perennial pushover, and this with Hoyer at the helm. Miles Austin forgot how to suck for at least a week. Andrew Hawkins is proving worthy of the flyer I took on him. Despite no Ben Tate, Terrance West and Isaiah Crowell have filled in admirably. After a week one comeback came up just short, they beat the NO Saints on a last second FG in week 2. Might be a little bit of an overreaction here, but in a weak division look for the Browns to try and make a splash this season. From a fantasy perspective, we are still waiting on word for Josh Gordon's definitive status, and word from Cleveland is they really like Isaiah Crowell's game. Look for him to see an increased workload, and West becomes more of a 3rd down change of pace back.
AJ Green - A toe, really? Anyone remember a certain Rashad Johnson getting a finger torn off? Toughen up man.
New York Giants - I might catch some flack this one, but I think the G-Men are two weeks away from that offense clicking. Minus a punt return TD and a flukey fumble (wtf Jennings), they win the ball game against a good Arizona team this weekend. Victor Cruz will ideally lose the diva attitude and start catching balls, and Larry Donnell looks to be the real deal. The offense is designed to limit turnovers and move the ball methodically up the field. I think it can accomplish that and suits their personnel, just need to get everyone on the same page and Eli needs to lose the "spray and pray" mentality of last season.
Aaron Rodgers - Anyone think this guy isn't the best in the business right now? Jets applied constant pressure on Sunday, moving Aaron outside the pocket. Didn't slow him down, and if anything, he might be better outside of the hashmarks. Has not had a legitimate o-line in his entire career, but still gets it done week in and week out.
Jordy Nelson - Unbelievable hands. The long TD reception is the only that comes to mind where he wasn't making a tough catch.
Smiths on the Ravens - To begin this season, I had high hopes for Torrey Smith with Steve Smith Sr. coming to town. Finally someone to draw attention away from Torrey and open up more opportunities. Shaping up right now like that could't be farther from the truth. Through two games, Steve Smith Sr. has been targeted 25 times to Torrey's 10.
Sammy Watkins - Showing some toughness as a young gun in the league. Had himself a day this weekend even with the rib injury (AJ Green you reading this?). The Bills defense looks legit, EJ Manuel may be capable of managing ball games, and CJ Spiller showing some explosiveness this season. And don't hold your breath, but the Buffalo Bills lead the AFC East!!!
Tom Brady - I was very much on the Tom Brady bounceback season train to begin this season. In my mind, Brady and Manning were never going to slow down until they called it quits. With Gronk coming back this season, Brady just had to be better, right? So far, not so good. Forget any sort of situational football, Brady just does not look like the Brady of old. Too early to be pressing the panic button on one of the best to ever sling it, but I want to see some improvement next weekend against a weak Raiders team.
Matt Cassell - You don't play in Foxborough anymore, you're throwing to the guys in purple.
Knile Davis - Charles goes down, the Chiefs run game doesn't miss a beat. Along with Christine Michael, Latavius Murray, and Terrance West, Davis was a preseason favorite to step up to the plate if granted the opportunity. Still early to speculate on the Charles injury, but given any sort extended absence, Davis is a more than capable fill-in.
Kirk Cousins - In what I think may be a blessing in disguise, Kirk Cousins is the Redskins (am I allowed to use that name in print?) QB for the near future. With athletes a plenty around him, might be worth a pickup considering the poor play of some of the league's best so far.
Dallas Cowboys - Finally, someone is smart enough in Dallas to see the gem that is Demarco Murray and use him as such. Too many times last year Murray would dominate the first half to inexplicably see no action in the second half. They pounded the rock on Sunday and beat a very good Titans team in my opinion. If they can utilize Murray in controlling the clock and keeping that god awful defense off the field, might be able to steal a couple more W's. Also, I am on record in the preseason as saying Murray, if healthy for 16, will finish as a top 5 fantasy RB. You heard it here folks.
PS. That defense is bad. There is 12 of us in this league. Should we be trying out in Dallas? Kaier, can you get to work on some defensive schemes?
Antonio Gates - And here is this week's most over-added player. Had a career day Sunday against the league's best defense, but I think this is the best game Gates puts up this year. There is a lot of wear and tear on that body, and Ladarius Green is a stud in waiting.
Richard Sherman - If you have Twitter, please give this guy a follow. Great entertainment.
Josh McCown - Just not good so far. Plays with one of the best "throw it up and he'll get it" receivers in the game in Vincent Jackson and one of the best coming out of college in Mike Evans and he is just not getting it done. I had high hopes for McCown going into this year, considering he would be going from two big receivers in Chicago (Marshall, Jeffery) to two big receivers in Tampa. With Doug Martin proving to be dirt, not looking good right now for Lovie Smith and the Bucs.
Arian Foster - 55 attempts, 231 yards in two games thus far this season. That's quite the workload. Looking to prove the naysayers wrong when questioned about his durability. If we are seeing a reemergence of the Arian Foster of old, could prove to be quite the lineup with AJ Green and Dez Bryant on "Ants in my Eyes Collins."
Ahmad Bradshaw - Looks to be the guy in Indy. Went from a clear backup to seeing the most (as well as most significant) snaps of the two. Gotta give Richardson some credit for the way he ran last night, but two fumbles isn't going to win you a starters job. Also, Indy cannot run block. Bradshaw being the quicker man and better in the pass game figures to be the better choice in that situation. And with Indy's defense looking pretty suspect thus far, may find themselves down in games and going to the pass.
Nick Foles - Threw for 330 yards, but 150 of those were on dink and dunks to Darren Sproles. Has looked less than impressive so far to me, and looks almost gun shy coming out of the gate early in games. I expected him to come way back down to Earth this season in terms of production, we'll see how that pans out in the coming weeks, especially with a couple matchups against better defenses.
So that really wraps up week 2 for me, let me know what you think boys and be on the lookout for my bi-weekly power rankings later this week.
Thursday, September 11, 2014
BAMA Watch!
Week 1
Much more of this to come. Stay tuned!
Much more of this to come. Stay tuned!
Alaska, USA: Flaunting his skinny wiener for all the Kodiak's to see.
Kaier's Couch, USA: Giving his skinny wiener a rest while closely monitoring his Week 1 defeat.
Week 2 Predictions
Week 2 Predictions
2014 Record: 3-3
Thank god football is back. Sunday’s are a little less
depressing. The impending winter is a little less intimidating. And life is
much more…stressful. For the other five losers from Week 1, I am sure you
agree. There is nothing more stressful
than starting the season winless and one step closer to the BAMA. Except maybe
one thing: winning. I think my texting conversation with the commissioner
Sunday night perhaps best sums up the emotions of being on both ends of a
decision:
Ah yes, fantasy football. Whether the servers are working or not, it won't change the fact that for the next 15 weeks Sunday afternoons and Monday nights will take countless years off our lives. Congrats to Evan for winning this season’s
first $10 payout. Now to Week 2 projections (Note: this will be the last week
using “The Useless Chick” as a key predictor. At this point, if anyone is
starting a player that can be deemed truly useless, than you, sir, are useless).
Dark Force (0-1) at Las Vegas Outlaws (1-0)
The Looks: Demaryious Thomas. Quote from Varney while
talking about Thomas’ Week 1 performance: “I never liked his hands personally,
that’s why I stay away from him.” It’s hard to trust the owner of the
last-place PB Pandemonium and a notorious late-season choke-artist, but until
Thomas proves he can hang onto the ball I kind of have to agree with Mike here
(note: I’m not saying Thomas isn’t great, but I also don’t expect him to reach
his 25 point projection).
The Brains: Nick Foles. Did you see the Colts defense last
Sunday night? Simply not the same without Robert Mathis.
The Muscle: Le’Veon Bell. If nothing else, Bell deserves to
be in this spot as an apology for not including any mention of him in my Week 1
predictions. Oh, and he averaged 117 total yards against Baltimore in his rookie
season.
The Wildcard: Justin Hunter. Hunter fits the mold of the
prototypical Wildcard. A burner with low PPR value but big play potential. The
factor that tilts this week in Hunter’s favor though is the opposing defense.
Damn they're bad.
The Useless Chick: Kyle Rudolph. The only thing keeping
Rudolph from assuming this role is the endzone. The Patriots are notoriously
tough on opposing TE’s, so don’t expect much by way of yard and catches. A
score could make Rudolph relevant. A shutout and well…meet this matchup’s
Useless Chick.
Prediction: It pains me to do this, but I simply can’t pick
a team featuring Hunter at WR2 and Rudolph in the flex. Here’s to hoping the
reverse jinx is in play. Las Vegas Outlaws 132, Dark Force 119
The Old Guys Club (1-0) at PB Pandamonium (0-1)
The Looks: Larry Fitzgerald. Let’s just call the Fitzy vs.
Cruz matchup a wash right now, and not in a good way. Michael Floyd now clearly
looks like the man in AZ and little John Brown is a playmaker himself, leaving
Larry Fitzgerald as the aging great slowly getting shown the door.
The Brains: Randall Cobb. An angry Packers offense coming
off a Week 1 embarassment vs. an overconfident Jets defense coming off a
classic “Welcome to NFL” performance against a rookie QB? I think I’ll side
with the Packer here, especially considering a converted safety and a man named
Darren Walls will be starting at corner opposite him.
The Muscle: Reggie Wayne. I feel like I could pick Manning for this category every week, so I'll try to buck the trend before it begins and go with Wayne here. Philly’s defense made Allen
Hurns look like a younger version of Wayne last week, so what happens when they
face the real, albeit older, Wayne on Monday night?
The Wildcard: Zach Ertz. Ertz will have his fair share of
bust games, but don’t count on this week being one of them. Just watch Julius
Thomas hgihlights from last week’s date with the Colts.
The Useless Chick: I would’ve picked Cruz for The Looks too,
but I’m not sure if I’m allowed to shame one player so much (but seriously, 22 points?). As long as Varney keeps starting him though, I may
eventually need to make an exception for the laughable Giants offense’s WR1.
Prediction: A lot of firepower in this matchup. I refuse to read in to ESPN’s projections too much (I’d believe them much more if
they’d swap the projections given to Ertz and Cruz), but I still like Varney to bounce back from Week
1’s 87 point performance in a big way. PB Pandemonium 136, The Old Guys Club 128
Redwood Chipalopes (0-1) at Touch My TD’s (0-1)
The Looks: Deangelo Williams. I’ve never liked Williams in
the RB-by-committee Panthers offense. I especially don’t like him now that he’s
missed Thursday’s practice with a bad thigh.
The Brains: Greg Olsen. Just because one Panther doesn’t
deserve his projection, doesn’t mean all Panther’s don’t. The Lions made Larry
Donnell a household name last week, so what will they do in Week 2 when they
face an actual household name in Olsen?
The Muscle: Andrew Luck. Shady or Luck? Both had solid Week
1’s as the predicted Muscles, so who to go with this week? I’ll go with the one
guaranteed to touch the ball on every offensive snap.
The Wildcard: Cordarrelle Patterson. Patterson, a Week 1
stud, was one 67-yard run away from being a Week 1 bust. Expect a similar type
high-upside performance in Week 2 with just one exception: Darrelle Revis.
The Useless Chick: Andre Ellington. He’s not 100% healthy,
and pretty much the only thing the Giants did right last week was defend the
run. Of course, Ellington is always a threat to break the big one. But I’m
guessing he won’t.
Prediction: I didn’t mention Harvin here, but I love his
matchup against the Chargers. I also expect Brandon Marshall to reassume the
role of “The Man” with Alshon hurting. Plus I’m predicting/praying the Vikings
shut down the Pats offense. Redwood Chipalopes 127, Touch My TD’s 115
Roc City Superdudes (1-0) @ SGF Dirtdogs (0-1)
The Looks: Donnie Avery. Sure, Avery finally played to the
potential that many people have seen in him for some time now. But that comes
just in time for Dwayne Bowe to return from suspension. I don’t love Bow, but I
don’t love Avery either. In fact, I don’t love any Chief until proven
otherwise.
The Brains: Vernon Davis. I’ve hated Davis’ fantasy game for
a while now (a bitter former owner), but I love this stat: 15 of Kaepernick’s
last 23 touchdown passes have gone to the Niners’ polarizing tight end. Oh, and
the Bears defense kind of sucks.
The Muscle: Drew Brees. Brees didn’t play like The Muscle in
a Week 1 shootout, but had a red zone interception gone differently his numbers
would have looked much better. Another team that played in a Week 1 shootout?
The Browns.
The Wildcard: Reggie Bush. Bush could certainly come close
to or exceed his 16-point projection, but he could also score single digits
against a tough Panthers defense. Will Bush make that one big play in the
passing game to make him a Week 2 game changer?
The Useless Chick: Joique Bell. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t
really like Bush more than Bell this week, I just think he has the better
chance to actually make a difference. I wouldn’t be happy about starting either
Detroit back against Carolina, but I’d be less happy about starting Bell.
Prediction: Tough matchups abound in this one with the
Seattle, San Francisco and Carolina defenses in the fold. It pains me to do
this, but I have to pick Kaier to get his first win since winning (er…losing)
the BAMA in a low-scoring affair. SGF Dirtdogs 105, Roc City Superdudes 93
Rough Riders (1-0) @ The Fat Cats (1-0)
The Looks: Robert Griffin III. If you’re going to put up big
fantasy numbers as a QB, you should typically start by throwing the ball past the
line of scrimmage. By this time next week, don’t be surprised if “Cousins over
Griffin” surpasses “Roger Goodell is an incompetent liar” as the top NFL
headline.
The Brains: Marshawn Lynch. I could care less about the
matchup, I’m choosing Beast Mode simply because I’d feel bad not including his
name somewhere.
The Muscle: Jordy Nelson. I feel like every other Aaron
Rogers pass found its way to Jordy in Week 1 (maybe because he was avoiding an
entire half of the football field). Following that logic, shouldn’t every Rogers pass find its way to Nelson
against a dismal Jets secondary in Week 2?
The Wildcard: CJ Spiller. Pros: Spiller got a surprising 18
touches in Week 1 and is known to be a Dolphins killer. Cons: The Dolphins
defense looked solid against the Pats last week and Fred Jackson should be
well-rested after getting 8 less looks than his backfield partner.
The Useless Chick: Zac Stacy. Wow, how the mighty have fallen.
Back when Bradford was in the mix and the Rams threatened some form of a
balanced offense, Stacy had great value. With Austin Davis as the likely Week 2
starter…not so much.
Prediction: Calvin, Jordy, Jimmy and the rest of The Fat
Cats – Zac Stacy excluded – keep rolling in this one. The Fat Cats 129, Rough Riders 108
Ethan's Mom's Panties (0-1) @ Ants in My Eyes Collins (1-0)
The Looks: Dez Bryant. From The Muscle to The Looks in one week. Such is the life of a Cowboy in 2014. Dez is a great talent, but his team is a mess with no reason to be optimistic heading into Week 2. Not to mention the improved Titans gave up the 2nd fewest points to opposing wideouts last year.
The Brains: Kendall Wright. Kendall Wright is built for the slot. The Cowboys are built to haplessly defend the slot. Kendall Wright is built to dominate the Cowboys in this Week 2 matchup.
The Muscle: Aaron Rodgers. I've picked on the Jets to the point that you've probably already guessed that I'm trying to jinx Sunday's game in their favor. If you've come to that conclusion, you're 100% correct. But still, what's not to like in Rodgers matchup against the Jets? Expect a major bounce back from the best all-around QB in the league in Week 2.
The Wildcard: Arian Foster. 29 touches in Week 1 and still healthy? That alone was a shocker. So what does Foster do for an encore in Week 2? If another 20+ touches are in the game plan this week, you can expect a possible game changing performance from Foster against a Raiders defense that got bullied on the ground by the Jets last week. Just be careful, because any touch can be the last of the game for the oft-injured Foster.
The Useless Chick: Blair Walsh. Because the Vikings will be doing nothing but scoring TD's on the Pats all day. And because pretty much everyone in this matchup serves a purpose.
Prediction: How did I not mention AP against a suspect Pats' defense? If it didn't have the oldest roster in The Equalizer, I may side with Ethan's Mom's Panties in this one. Instead, I'll side with the kid of the mom whose panties the team is named after. Ants in My Eyes Collins 131, Ethan's Mom's Panties 118
Ethan's Mom's Panties (0-1) @ Ants in My Eyes Collins (1-0)
The Looks: Dez Bryant. From The Muscle to The Looks in one week. Such is the life of a Cowboy in 2014. Dez is a great talent, but his team is a mess with no reason to be optimistic heading into Week 2. Not to mention the improved Titans gave up the 2nd fewest points to opposing wideouts last year.
The Brains: Kendall Wright. Kendall Wright is built for the slot. The Cowboys are built to haplessly defend the slot. Kendall Wright is built to dominate the Cowboys in this Week 2 matchup.
The Muscle: Aaron Rodgers. I've picked on the Jets to the point that you've probably already guessed that I'm trying to jinx Sunday's game in their favor. If you've come to that conclusion, you're 100% correct. But still, what's not to like in Rodgers matchup against the Jets? Expect a major bounce back from the best all-around QB in the league in Week 2.
The Wildcard: Arian Foster. 29 touches in Week 1 and still healthy? That alone was a shocker. So what does Foster do for an encore in Week 2? If another 20+ touches are in the game plan this week, you can expect a possible game changing performance from Foster against a Raiders defense that got bullied on the ground by the Jets last week. Just be careful, because any touch can be the last of the game for the oft-injured Foster.
The Useless Chick: Blair Walsh. Because the Vikings will be doing nothing but scoring TD's on the Pats all day. And because pretty much everyone in this matchup serves a purpose.
Prediction: How did I not mention AP against a suspect Pats' defense? If it didn't have the oldest roster in The Equalizer, I may side with Ethan's Mom's Panties in this one. Instead, I'll side with the kid of the mom whose panties the team is named after. Ants in My Eyes Collins 131, Ethan's Mom's Panties 118
Tuesday, September 9, 2014
Week 1 Observations, Rants, Etc.
After each week I will be posting a Tuesday observation/rant/trash talk/analysis of the weekend's results. This post will be full of team bias, potentially unreasonable hatred of certain players (RG III), and complete overreactions to likely insignificant events.
Tony Romo - Something wrong with Romo this week, but when they get it figured out, there will certainly be points galore around Dallas. Thrashed a good SF defense (although depleted), Demarco Murray running the football like a man. Defense may be worse than we ever imagined.
Russell Wilson - Opposite of Romo, looks incredible. Addition of Percy Harvin opening up whole new playbook with read option, perfect for athletic, cerebral QB. Got the ball out quick against a very good GB pass rush. If they open up the playbook and let Wilson sling it a little bit, look out.
Anquan Boldin - Everyone talks about Crabtree and Kap's rapport, but may we have seen a Boldin reemergence with Crabtree out all last season. With Crabtree on the field today, Boldin was the one targeted in clutch situations.
Miami Dolphins - Miami might be the real deal this year. Mike Wallace looks poised for a good year, Knowshon Moreno proving haters wrong once again, and really got to one of the best QB's in the league with the pass rush. Ryan Tannehill was someone I saw as being on the verge of being very good, maybe we will see that potential realized.
Michael Crabtree - Where the hell are you man? Hamstring problem, calf problem, barely targeted against a porous Dallas defense in your own homecoming? Come on, man.
GB Defense - Omg a pass rush! Don't look now, but we were able to put pressure on a very athletic QB in Russell Wilson. However, loss of Raji proving to be huge to run defense. If it isn't one thing it's the next...
Washington Redskins - Not much to say here other than when does Kirk Cousins start? Also, Arian Foster stay healthy kid, and if he does, I think we'll see the same old out of Foster as long as Fitzpatrick performs well enough to prevent teams loading the box.
Denver Broncos - Peyton Manning is still really good. I just hope the Chargers can keep up so he keeps playing all year.
Victor Cruz - See Michael Crabtree.
New York Giants - Eli does not look comfortable in this new Ben McAdoo scheme. Receivers are not on the same page.
Larry Donnell - Who are you and where did you come from? In one of the weakest positional spots in the NFL (NYG TE's), he was the lone decent take away from last night's game. Twice on the goal line he was targeted on a fade, including on fourth down. Someone to keep an eye on.
Matthew Stafford - Perhaps the most impressive QB of the weekend. Looked incredibly mobile in the pocket, and was smart with the football. A major knock on him had been his tendency to try and force the issue, but last night he was very smart with the football. With the weapons at his disposal, look out.
Las Vegas Outlaws - Evan begins the year with guns blazing, throwing up a 149 in week one. Duo of Steelers Antonio Brown and Leveon Ball were certainly on their game this weekend, and might we possibly see a Marques Colston revival this year? Only time will tell.
A little concerning I would have lost to the "perrenial BAMA favorite" SGF Dirtdogs this week. PB Pandemonium needs to right the ship in week 2. Well that wraps up week one for me and whatever random thoughts entered my head since Sunday. Please feel free to drop comments below on any additional happenings this week. HAPPY NFL SEASON EVERYONE!!!
Tony Romo - Something wrong with Romo this week, but when they get it figured out, there will certainly be points galore around Dallas. Thrashed a good SF defense (although depleted), Demarco Murray running the football like a man. Defense may be worse than we ever imagined.
Russell Wilson - Opposite of Romo, looks incredible. Addition of Percy Harvin opening up whole new playbook with read option, perfect for athletic, cerebral QB. Got the ball out quick against a very good GB pass rush. If they open up the playbook and let Wilson sling it a little bit, look out.
Anquan Boldin - Everyone talks about Crabtree and Kap's rapport, but may we have seen a Boldin reemergence with Crabtree out all last season. With Crabtree on the field today, Boldin was the one targeted in clutch situations.
Miami Dolphins - Miami might be the real deal this year. Mike Wallace looks poised for a good year, Knowshon Moreno proving haters wrong once again, and really got to one of the best QB's in the league with the pass rush. Ryan Tannehill was someone I saw as being on the verge of being very good, maybe we will see that potential realized.
Michael Crabtree - Where the hell are you man? Hamstring problem, calf problem, barely targeted against a porous Dallas defense in your own homecoming? Come on, man.
GB Defense - Omg a pass rush! Don't look now, but we were able to put pressure on a very athletic QB in Russell Wilson. However, loss of Raji proving to be huge to run defense. If it isn't one thing it's the next...
Washington Redskins - Not much to say here other than when does Kirk Cousins start? Also, Arian Foster stay healthy kid, and if he does, I think we'll see the same old out of Foster as long as Fitzpatrick performs well enough to prevent teams loading the box.
Denver Broncos - Peyton Manning is still really good. I just hope the Chargers can keep up so he keeps playing all year.
Victor Cruz - See Michael Crabtree.
New York Giants - Eli does not look comfortable in this new Ben McAdoo scheme. Receivers are not on the same page.
Larry Donnell - Who are you and where did you come from? In one of the weakest positional spots in the NFL (NYG TE's), he was the lone decent take away from last night's game. Twice on the goal line he was targeted on a fade, including on fourth down. Someone to keep an eye on.
Matthew Stafford - Perhaps the most impressive QB of the weekend. Looked incredibly mobile in the pocket, and was smart with the football. A major knock on him had been his tendency to try and force the issue, but last night he was very smart with the football. With the weapons at his disposal, look out.
Las Vegas Outlaws - Evan begins the year with guns blazing, throwing up a 149 in week one. Duo of Steelers Antonio Brown and Leveon Ball were certainly on their game this weekend, and might we possibly see a Marques Colston revival this year? Only time will tell.
A little concerning I would have lost to the "perrenial BAMA favorite" SGF Dirtdogs this week. PB Pandemonium needs to right the ship in week 2. Well that wraps up week one for me and whatever random thoughts entered my head since Sunday. Please feel free to drop comments below on any additional happenings this week. HAPPY NFL SEASON EVERYONE!!!
Thursday, September 4, 2014
Week 1 Predictions
Week 1 Predictions
*Note: This post was written during the Seattle vs. Green Bay season opener. All players and results from the game were purposely excluded (just trying to come up for an excuse as to why I didn't talk up Marshawn Lynch more, dude was beast).
Fantasy football is an intricate game of individual matchups.
Each week, I’ll take a deeper look into these matchups to predict the 6 winners.
To do so, I’ll follow the classic group
paradigm as established by the great Mac of Always Sunny lore. Every matchup
will be scrutinized at the individual level to decipher who holds the overall
edge for the week. A look at the paradigm:
The Looks:
Big chested projections, mosquito bites production. Who will
prove to be nothing more than a pretty face?
The Brains:
It’s not always about the name on the back of the jersey,
but rather the name on the front of his opponents. Who is the smartest play of
the week?
The Muscle:
In football, some guys just outmuscle the competition. Who
is the lock of the week?
The Wildcard:
Boom or bust is the name of the game here. Who’s floor is as
low as his ceiling is high?
The Useless Chick:
You could leave this guy out of your starting lineup, and it
wouldn’t make a difference. He’s just kind of there.
SGF Dirtdogs (0-0) at The Fat Cats (0-0)
The Looks: Reggie
Bush. I love the weapons on the Lions. I almost love them too much. With only
one ball to go around, will Bush get enough touches to reach his potential?
The Brains: Colin
Kaepernick. Ignore the sluggish preseason performance and take a quick peak at
the Cowboys defensive depth chart.
The Muscle: Jimmy
Graham. Whether he’s lined up at tight end or wide receiver, it won’t matter.
The only challenge facing Graham Sunday will be containing the urge to throw it
down after each TD scored.
The Wildcard:
Desean Jackson. This one’s almost unfair, as Jackson has made a career out of
the wildcard role. Still though, he’s the one player in this matchup that has
the potential to double or even triple his projection with ease.
Useless Chick:
Jacquizz Rodgers. The name alone makes him deserving of a roster spot in the
Equalizer, but a starting role in Week 1?
Prediction: Last
season’s BAMA winning Dirtdogs boasts a roster worthy of a repeat, and The Fat
Cats is beyond qualified to help steer it in the right direction.
The Fat Cats 149, SGF Dirtdogs 93
Touch My TD’s (0-0) at Rough Riders (0-0)
The Looks: Alfred
Morris. Morris is projected for 15 points Week 1, a number he reached or
exceeded only twice last season. A defensive line featuring Watt and Clowney is
not exactly what I’d call a favorable matchup either. Bust potential here.
The Brains: Jeremy
Maclin. Chip Kelly’s offense just puts up points, both on the field and in
fantasy. Against a Jaguars D that struggled against opposing wideouts last
year, I’ll put my faith in Chip and Maclin to exceed this week’s projection.
(Note: Cordarelle Patterson deserves mentioning here, too. Very favorable
matchup against a blitz-heavy defense, his projection of 19 should be spot-on).
The Muscle: Andrew
Luck. Denver’s D is much improved, but its not like we’re talking about a
top-10 defense cracking the top-5. Denver was 27th against the pass
last year, and even if its sniffing the top half of the league this year it
won’t be enough to stop Luck.
The Wildcard: Rob
Gronkowski. Will he or won’t he, that’s the question here. If he does, even
just for a few snaps, expect Brady to be looking his way.
The Useless Chick: Delanie
Walker. Walker’s no bum, but no stud either. Against a stout Chiefs defense
that allowed the 3rd fewest points to opposing tight ends last year,
don’t expect a game-changing performance here.
Prediction: This
matchup is a wildcard in itself. Both these teams have question marks,
favorable and unfavorable matchups, and tons of speed on their rosters. In that
case, I’ll just go with the team playing more players at home.
Touch My TD’s 119, Rough Riders 114
Ants in My Eyes Collins (0-0) at Dark Force (0-0)
The Looks: Ben
Tate. Hasn’t Tate been the looks for years? That sexy sleeper pick just waiting
to carry your team to the title once Arian Foster inevitably gets hurt. Now
that Tate is single and ready to mingle amongst the big boys, expect him to
prove himself the tease he’s always been.
The Brains:
Demaryious Thomas. With Wes Welker out this is almost unfair. Throw in a Hall
of Fame quarterback looking to put a Super Bowl loss behind him against the
team with which he made his name and, well, ‘nuff said.
The Muscle: Dez
Bryant. I don’t care that the game is against a stout (but in shambles) 49ers
defense. Expect a big game here from Dez in a classic Texas shootout.
The Wildcard:
Shane Vereen. Only a 10-point projection in a PPR league that Vereen all but
dominated when healthy last season? But
alas, Vereen’s talent or workload has never been the issue; “when healthy”
(which he is, for now) is the key disclaimer here.
The Useless Chick:
Travis Kelce. Kelce gets this honor by default, because I really love the
waiver-wire pickup by our Commissioner. Give it time and it will pay off, but
first, give it time.
Prediction: Expect
a tight matchup up until 9:45 PM EST Sunday night, at which point the Broncos
should have a few TD’s on the board courtesy of Manning to Thomas (either one
works).
Dark Force 126, Ants in My Eyes Collins 115
Dark Force 126, Ants in My Eyes Collins 115
Ethan’s Mom’s Panties (0-0) vs. The Old Guys Club (0-0)
The Looks: Andre
Johnson. I couldn’t decide which aging receiver to go with here: Andre or Larry
Fitz. I guess I’ll go with the one catching balls from Ryan Fitzpatrick.
The Brains: Jamaal
Charles. It’s hard to consider Charles a smart
play any week because he’d never be a bench consideration. But still, hard
not to love this matchup against a porous Titans run defense.
The Muscle: Adrian
Peterson. The Rams dominating D-line is surprisingly soft against opposing
RB’s. Oh yeah, and AP guaranteed a touchdown on his first touch Sunday. At this
point you kind of have to trust him.
The Wildcard: Emmanuel
Sanders. Apparently, in the NFL you get suspended 4 games for taking Molly but
just 2 games for hitting Molly. Not much
sense in that, but Sanders owners should find some solace in knowing they have
a potential WR2 in their lineups for the next 4 weeks.
The Useless Chick:
Greg Jennings. At least Jennings was immortalized via YouTube years ago,
because his days of making his name on the field appear to be behind him.
Prediction: Last
year’s champion boasts a new roster with tons of young potential that should
only get better with time. For the present, however, Jamaal Charles should be
enough.
The Old Guys Club: 136, Ethan’s Mom’s Panties 122
The Old Guys Club: 136, Ethan’s Mom’s Panties 122
PB Pandemonium (0-0) at Roc City Super Dudes (0-0)
The Looks: Victor
Cruz. The Giants first team offense did anything but look good in the preseason,
and while I feel that it will eventually get there as the players learn a new
system, Week 1 isn’t the time to expect a bounce-back performance from Cruz.
The Brains: Matt
Ryan. Ignore the 11-point projection. I’d set that as a low floor for Ryan in
this one. The Saints defense is much improved, but so is the Falcons offense
just by way of being healthy. Playing at home, Ryan throws for multiple scores
in this one.
The Muscle: Peyton
Manning. This is a cop-out, but if not for Manning, I wouldn’t expect a very
competitive match from Pandemonium this week. Manning will carry the squad, but
will it be enough?
The Wildcard: Michael
Crabtree. You’ve got to love the matchup against the ‘Boys, but that might be
all there is to love this week. Crab missed practice Wednesday with a bad calf,
and his team’s offense wasn’t exactly inspiring in the preseason.
The Useless Chick: Trent
Richardson. Almost every starter on both these fantasy squads deserves to be
playing this week, but Richardson is by far the least deserving of the bunch.
As a former owner of the first round bust, I’ll believe it when I see it.
Prediction: Roc
City is built like a PPR machine. Manning will keep Pandemonium in this one,
but Matty Ice will do just enough to close the gap and get the Super Dudes the
W.
Roc City Super Dudes 127, PB Pandemonium 121
Roc City Super Dudes 127, PB Pandemonium 121
Las Vegas Outlaws
(0-0) vs. Redwood Chipalopes (0-0)
The Looks: Vincent
Jackson. The Panthers defense is tough, holding V-Jax to a combined 22 points
in 2 meetings last season. 17 points might be tough to come by in this one.
The Brains: Buccaneers
D/ST. My money is on Ace Boogie getting the start in this one, but whether its
him or Derek Anderson at QB for the Panthers, look for Lovie Smith's improved Bucs defense to have fun with Carolina’s lack of weapons. It may not seem
significant enough, but in such a tightly projected fantasy matchup, a
defensive explosion could be enough to tilt the game in one team's favor.
The Muscle: Lesean
McCoy. Shady should have a field day working in Chip Kelly’s uber-efficient
offense against an improved yet still suspect Jags D.
The Wildcard: Greg
Olsen. If Cam Newton makes the game-time decision to start, Olsen is more
muscle than wildcard. But if QB1 is relegated to the bench, Olsen should be
considered for similar treatment with the possibility of D.A. looming.
The Useless Chick: Steven
Jackson. When its slim picking, always pick the aging running back to have an underwhelming week.
Prediction: The
Killer B’s for the Outlaws (Ball, Bell, and Brown) did not get enough mention
here, and could totally make me look like an idiot come Sunday. But still, I’ll
side with the Chipalopes and their favorable matchups in this one.
Redwood Chipalopes 128, Las Vegas Outlaws 124.
Redwood Chipalopes 128, Las Vegas Outlaws 124.
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